Probability
by Thalia Weaver
Summary: A girl who is rather prone to accidents, fainting and embarrassment finds herself in pre-LotR Rivendell. In a word: gleep.
1. Prologue

Probability By Thalia Weaver  
  
A/N: Okay. This is a self-insert, and probably a Mary-Sue. And not that well-written. It deserves flames. But I was compelled. My Muse was about to murder me, and was threatening to give me Permanent Writer's Block if I didn't write this.  
  
Disclaimer: LotR isn't mine. Thalia is me.  
  
Prologue  
  
"Nine Walkers you shall be, to balance the Nine Riders that are evil," Lord Elrond Peredhil proclaimed. An odd feeling, nothing but a slight momentary tremor, really, touched the most perceptive Elves of the group. Most of them did not even notice it, for they were too caught up in the council's aftermath. At any rate, it was never discussed by them, and was probably forgotten.  
  
To those not familiar with the quantum multidimensional theory, what actually happened then would be near impossible to understand. Instead let us say that Elrond's commanding voice set off a chain of events that culminated in three things: an Elf in Lothlorien had a momentary craving for chocolate; a philology professor at Oxford jotted "in a hole in the ground there lived a hobbit" on the back of a test paper; and a sleeping young lady woke up in Middle Earth.  
  
Unfortunately, it is the last culmination of the probability chain that will be discussed here. 


	2. Chapter One: Planck's Constant

Chapter One: Planck's Constant  
  
A/N: The beginning of this chapter is from my brain, but the information contained within is taken from 'The Elegant Universe', written by Brian Greene. Disclaimer: Neither quantum physics nor Middle-Earth is mine.  
  
Imagine a distance so small that if you inflated an atom to the size of the known universe it would be about the size of a tree. Now imagine that every particle of matter in everything you touch is actually not solid but a wave; but the wave's frequency is so small that it feels solid anyway. And imagine something tiny enough to pass through a wave with a frequency that small.  
  
~. ~. ~  
  
"Where am I?" Thalia Weaver asked it, a question that was understandable, considering that she had gone to sleep in one place and woken up in another. Of course, she did not expect the answer.  
  
"Rivendell," came the answer despite. "In the house of Lord Elrond Peredhil, thought why he would allow a spy of Sauron into the Last Homely House is beyond my knowledge."  
  
Thalia stiffened, then laughed. "Ah, lovely. Another dream. I'd prefer to be in Minas Tirith with Aragorn, thanks, though Rivendell is quite nice." She nodded expectantly at the elf, who was sitting beside her bed; he merely stared speechlessly at her for a moment, then stiffened.  
  
"How do you know of Estel?"  
  
Thalia giggled. "How do you know of him? Hmm?"  
  
It was a favorite pastime of hers to irritate the people she met in her dreams; it was great practice for 'real life'  
  
"I asked you; do not evade my questions, woman."  
  
Thalia blinked. "I know of the Dunedan from his wanderings through Middle- Earth," she improvised.  
  
"What wanderings, pray tell? He is but fifteen."  
  
Thalia gasped. "You mean.? But I've never had a pre-LotR dream before! This is excellent!"  
  
The Elf blinked, utterly confused by this.person, who acted like no minion of Sauron that he had so far come across. Of course, the only minions of Sauron he had actually come across were Orcs, Haradri soldiers and trolls- no female ones at all.  
  
"I'm really lucky that the laws of linguistic syntax don't apply while I'm dreaming," Thalia babbled happily. "Hey, this bed is really soft. What's this material?"  
  
"Flax." the slightly shell-shocked Elf answered.  
  
"Hey- who are you? Are you just a random elf? Do you know the sons of Elrond? Elladan and Elrohir are spiffy." The hyper girl bounced excitedly up and down on the soft elven bed, sitting on top of the covers.  
  
The elf blinked again. "My name is Beruthien," he said slowly. "I.I believe that the sons of Elrond are in Rivendell today..."  
  
Thalia stood up and began jumping on the bed.  
  
"What are you doing? The only person I have ever seen do that is little Estel.perhaps it is some sort of human affliction?"  
  
Thalia giggled. "You're funny, for a figment of my imagination! When are you going to take me to see the El kids?"  
  
"The.El.kids?" Beruthien asked, bewilderedly. Then he frowned. "Nay. You must stay in this room, for you are a spy of Sauron."  
  
Thalia stopped jumping. "I'm not a spy of Sauron, you silly elf. What gave you that idea?"  
  
"You.appeared.at the edge of Rivendell. Unconscious. And you do not look like anyone from the lands about. The East is stirring with evil, and the days are past when strangers can be trusted without suspicion."  
  
Thalia gasped, then turned and smacked her head against the wall of the small, beautifully decorated room. Hard. Beruthien, apparently deciding that it was all he could do to keep her in the room, simply watched bemusedly.  
  
"Ouch!" she cried, clutching her bruised forehead. Her face contorted with fear, she looked straight into the elf's eyes. "This isn't a dream, is it?" 


	3. Chapter Two: The Space Time Continuum

Chapter Two: The Space-Time Continuum

A/N: Once again, quantum physics from 'The Elegant Universe'. PLEASE tell me if this is incredibly Mary-Sue-ish!

Disclaimer: Quantum physics is an abstract principle. Lord of the Rings is a book.  Neither is mine. I'd say that's all they have in common. And 'El Kids' are from the PPC.

Imagine all the space in the universe as a stretched out piece of rubber, bent out of shape by the masses of stars and planets, nebulas and galaxies. Now imagine time as another overlaid grid, warped and twisted by gravitrical mass as well. Now imagine a third grid- an antimatter shadow of the other two- that does not exist in real time and cannot be felt, cannot be heard, and cannot be seen…

~. ~. ~

"No," the elf replied.

The girl breathed in deeply once, and then keeled over onto the bed.

She woke again not too long afterwards, and found herself staring at another elf. This one looked distinctly more noble and spiffy than Beruthien. He also looked even more confused. 

"I see you are awake," the elf commented.

"Thank you, Captain Obvious," muttered Thalia. 

"Impudence will not serve you well here," the elf said. 

Ignoring him, Thalia shut her eyes. "I am not here. Not. I have an ALGEBRA TEST TOMORROW! This is just a dream. I am NOT HERE. Give me my ruby slippers…I'm going home…"

The elf blinked. "You are barefoot."

"Of course I'm blooming barefoot! I'm wearing my FROGGY PAJAMAS, for God's sake! I'm ASLEEP!" She blinked, pausing for a moment, then sighed. "I'm not asleep, am I?"

The elf only shook his head, wordless. 

Desperate, Thalia stood up. "There's no place like home…there's no place like home…there's no place like home…" Considering that she was barefoot, the heel clicking wasn't very effective. 

"Where…_is…_your home?" The elf inquired hastily. 

"STRATFORD, NEW JERSEY, TWENTIETH CENTURY EARTH!" Thalia yelled, jumping on the bed for emphasis. She thought for a moment. "Come to think of it, I shouldn't understand you. I don't speak Westron."

"Yes, you do. Or you are speaking it now."

Thalia blinked again. "Who are you?"

"Tell me your name first."

"Thalia Weaver."

"Elladan Halfelven."

"_You're an El Kid?" _

"Beruthien told me you asked for us," Elladan said, ignoring Thalia's exclamation.

Thalia smiled beatifically. "I'm in Rivendell. Speaking Westron. To an El Kid."

Elladan blinked for a moment, then realized that 'El Kids' meant, as far as he could tell, sons of Elrond.  "Yes…" he replied. "And…?"

Thalia, having fainted again, made no reply.

The next time she awoke. The Peredhil himself was standing over her.

"Let me guess…Elrond Halfelven?" She asked dazedly, feeling light-headed.

"You know of me, of my sons, of my foster son, and of Rivendell," the master healer replied, grim-faced. "I have no choice but to think that you are sent to spy upon us."

Thalia raised an eyebrow. "I would rather die than spy for the Orc-master of Mordor."

"Empty words are easily said," Elrond replied. "Why should I believe you?"

"You shouldn't," answered Thalia simply. "I  wouldn't trust me, if I were you. But I am _not _a spy of Sauron." 

"Fair enough." Elrond almost smiled. Almost. 

_God almighty, I'm bargaining for my life here, _Thalia thought frantically. _Elrond won't hesitate to kill me. And I don't have a bloomin' thing to say to prove myself. _

"If you are not a spy of Sauron, how do you know of my doings, and my family?"

Thalia closed her eyes for a moment. _Shiesse. Merde. Caca. Buglush…_

"I…Lord Elrond, where I come from…I come from another world. There is- was, he's dead now- a man named Jonathan Ronald Reuel Tolkien. He wrote a book about Middle-Earth…about you, your children, and Sauron, and Gandalf, and Lorien and Rohan and Gondor." She smiled wryly. "I read it. Millions of people, all over my world, read it. And now…somehow…it's all real. And I'm here. This is somehow not a dream."

"A…storybook? This man- Tolkien- how did he know of Middle-Earth?" Elrond frowned.

Thalia shrugged. "The same way I know Westron…? I do not know." 

Elrond nodded slowly. "I do not know why, but I believe you."

"Does that mean I can leave this room?"

"Of course. But…" He looked pointedly at Thalia's froggy pajamas, consisting of warm flannel pants and a tank top, decorated with dancing frogs. "Perhaps you would like something more suitable to wear?"

Thalia blushed. "Thank you, my lord."


	4. Chapter Three: Thick Space

Probability

By Thalia Weaver

A/N: Yes, Sue-ish. Hopefully, funny. Yes, incredibly weird. And in need of reviews. The physics in this chapter concerns the 'quantum multidimensional theory of interaction', q- mult for short, a highly speculative and incredibly oddball theory detailed in Mark Hollsburg's excellent book 'Quantum Oddities: Quarks, Q-Nought and Infinite Dimensions of Occurrences'.  And yes, there IS a reason the chapters have such odd beginnings.

Disclaimer: All the literary concepts I own come to the value of Q0- that is to say, nothing. ;)

Chapter Three: Thick Space

Imagine an infinite number of universes all expanding infinitely, all originating in the same 'explosion', before time started- known as the big bang. Imagine that everything that happens in every universe has an impact in another. Imagine that every action has its reaction…whether it happens in 'thick space', in the realm of probability, or whether it happens in the world that we know of, that we live in…

~. ~. ~.

Thalia was left alone in the room; Elrond had left. She simply sat for a few moments, her expression somewhat akin to a stunned cow's. She did not even realize that she was stroking the soft grey velvet dress that Elrond had left for her. 

Holy fecking mother of a winky-frog, she thought. I'm. In. Rivendell. She then threw down the dress and began to jump around the room.

"Elven paradise…" she began humming to herself, then suddenly started laughing. I, Thalia Weaver, have been transported to a FICTIONAL UNIVERSE. And it's TOLKIEN! AHA! AHAHAHAH! She calmed down after a while. 

"Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god," she started to mutter. "I'm not home. I'm here. I'm in Rivendell. About…sixty-five years before the council…since…Aragorn was eighty when he left…and he's fifteen now-" She gasped.

"HOLY MOTHER OF A WINKY-FROG! HE HASN'T MET ARWEN YET!"

And with that, she fainted.

*** 

It was some hours before she came to.

"Meeeeowurgh," she groaned, clutching her head. She had hit it on the bedpost as she fell. "Ow. Owowowow. I hurt."

Then, she noticed the large window, through which sunlight was streaming. Beautiful, restful sunlight. "Nice…" she muttered. Then, "Oh my god! Oh my god! AGH! RIVENDELL! ELF SUNLIGHT!" 

A wadded ball of fabric lay under her butt, and she tugged it out. "Ah. My spiffy elf clothes." 

She was changed in a matter of seconds. Don't elf women wear bras? She wondered, somewhat pointlessly. It was unlucky that she hadn't worn a bra to sleep-

"Oh, god." She blushed profusely. That elf guy. The first one. I was jumping around like a maniac…gleep. How come Mary-sues don't ever have problems like this? She rubbed her aching head ruefully. And they aren't klutzy idiots either. But then, I suppose that anyone who has no grip on either reality or English grammar WOULD expect to meld perfectly into Elven society.

My god. I'm in Rivendell.

"Thalia?" 

Mother of a winky-frog- who the hell is that? 

"It is Beruthien." 

Beru- who? 

"You must open the door now."

Fine, fine.

Thalia opened the door, then realized that Beruthien was the first elf guy. Blushing profusely, she allowed him inside.

"Look- Beruthien- I want to apologize for my behavior before. I- well, I'm still in something of a state of shock. And I did think this was all a dream."

He smiled slightly. "Forgiven. Lord Elrond wanted me to ask you if you wished for any food. It was some hours ago that he left you, I believe."

Thalia nodded. "Excellent. I always wondered what elves eat."

Beruthien blinked. "Food."

Thalia tried to restrain herself from rolling her eyes; after all, she was still a precarious guest, and could be killed at any moment. Then, a thought occurred to her.

"Um…do you have…a bathroom? I have to pee…"

Beruthien nodded. "Down three corridors, the second door to the left." 

"Thanks." Thalia set off at a run, racing against time to answer nature's call. Ack! I can't pee in this spiffy elven dress. That would suck major shmucker-doodle-panty-hose. Three corridors down, second door to the- aha! Here! 

Despite the Elven spiffiness of Rivendell, there was STILL no indoor plumbing. After all, Middle-Earth was a medieval society. And so Thalia made use of the facilities, which were a spiffily decorated…hole. That somehow managed to smell like perfume, despite its…err…functions.  

Much relieved, she emerged some moments later to plow into another elf- Elladan, this time. 

"Thalia? I see you have made use of the clothing my father left for you," he said politely. Of course, she then noticed how very gorgeous he was- dark brown eyes, that seemed to have starlight captured within them, and a strong face- not feminine, but beautiful despite. And her heart started beating faster.

"Y-yes," she stammered. And blushed like a spectrum telescope measuring the Doppler shift of a light speeding away at 150 mph. Of course, Mary-Sues' faces don't light up like torches at the sight of...extremely…attractive males either. Damn it. 

"If I may…?" He asked, gesturing towards the door. Her face lighting up even further, she let him pass and walked off towards her room again. 

How the hell did I get to the bathroom in the first place? She wondered, looking around. The beauty of Rivendell was distracting, to say the least. The waterfalls…the trees…the balconies and terraces and such…she wandered, hypnotized, completely forgetting about Beruthien, who was pondering the existence of human diseases that prolonged the time span of bowel functions.

Ah…spiffy…pretty…Thalia thought, humming. Who needs to join the fellowship when you've got this place to wander around in?

She breathed in deeply. This is the same air that the Fellowship will breathe in sixty-five years. None of the Hobbits are alive yet…she frowned, trying to do the mental math. One hundred eleven minus sixty-five…is…forty-six. Forty-six years before the War of the Ring. 

"Thalia?"

Who's calling me? Ack, it's elf-boy. Forgot all about him. 

"Yes, Beruthien. I'm sorry I kept you waiting so long."

"You are forgiven. I came to tell you that Lord Elrond wished to let you know that the kitchens are open to you if you wish to eat."

Come to think of it, I am hungry.

"Thank you, Beruthien."

"Lord Elrohir and Lord Estel will return shortly from hunting, and I believe you have already met Lord Elladan." He grasped her hand, leading her, presumably, towards the kitchens of Rivendell. "Lord Elrond wished for me to let you know that he will keep you on as a guest for as long as you wish to stay, provided that you cause no disruptions in his household."

Thalia nodded. I wonder why Lord Elrond would take a complete stranger in? Why, this is positively Mary-Sueish. Unfortunately I don't get any of the PHYSICAL benefits.

"He wishes you to know also that the only reason he is taking you in is because you have knowledge of…Tolkien, he said? That he wishes to learn from you." Beruthien shrugged. "Lord Elrond is a great scholar. He will not stop questioning you until you have taught him everything he wishes to know."

Oh.


	5. Chapter Four: Quantum Ripples

Probability

By Thalia Weaver

A/N: Thank you for all the lovely reviews! ^^ I'm doing my best to write Elves. And doing awfully. But trying. ;)

Disclaimer: I own nothing. 'Holy mother of a winky-frog' is something I actually say, since you asked ^_^ So is 'shmucker-doodle-panty-hose.' Yes, I say odd things. .

__

Imagine that every action you do has ripples, like some kind of bizarre quantum shock wave. And those ripples pass through thick space. Into other universes. And then affect people/places/things…

~. ~ ~. ~

Thalia, munching on an Elven cake stolen from the kitchens, was completely oblivious to the people behind her until it was too late.

"Do not be discouraged that we came back empty-handed, Estel. That steer fled like Nahar, steed of Orome from our bows! And never have I seen such skill at hunting from one so young." The voice was close to Elladan's, though not quite his; it was easy to guess that it was Elrohir talking. 

"You make light of your own skill, my brother. I despair of ever matching the expertise of the Elves." The second voice was, though younger-sounding, unmistakably Aragorn's. And Thalia fainted. 

* * *

"Father? We found her unconscious in the kitchens…"

Thalia shook her head groggily. "Mrrgrmblhumblrumbl," she remarked intelligently. "Where am I?" Then she realized she was being carried, shook her head to clear it, and looked up into Aragorn's eyes.   


__

AAAAAAGH! 

Then she fainted again.

* * *

"Miss? Are you all right?"

The gentle query pierced Thalia's mental fog. "Hmm?" she responded sleepily, yawning.

"Are you all right?" 

She opened her eyes. "Yes, I think so," she responded, not looking at the person who was talking to her.

"Good. You rather frightened us- Elrohir and I, that is."

Thalia's jaw dopped; she had finally looked at him. _Him. _Aragorn, son of Arathorn. The Man who was the Center of Her Fangirl Dreams. 

"Aaaaaaaah," she responded, trying not to drool. _Ack! He looks so young! Almost…my age…_she thought. _Must…not…faint…_

"Miss? Are you _sure _you're all right?"

__

OF COURSE I'M NOT ALL RIGHT! I'M IN A FICTIONAL UNIVERSE TALKING TO THE MAN I'VE FANTASIZED ABOUT FOR- OH, MOST OF MY LIFE! No, I'm just fecking spiffy. AGH! 

"Yes, I'm fine. Are you the one they call Estel?"

"That I am. Lord Elrond asked me to carry you to your room. He wishes to speak to you when you have suitably recovered."

"I…" _He carried me to my room? While I was unconscious? Oh god….please tell me I didn't talk in my sleep again…_

"What does 'holy mother of a winky frog' mean?" He asked. "You said it several times while you were asleep."

__

DAMNIT! "It's…an expression. Like- 'by the Valar'?"

He nodded seriously. _Ack…sea-grey eyes…calm, deep, beautiful…strong, manly face…droooool…_

"And I believe you said 'fecking cinnamon rugelah on a stick'?"

Thalia cradled her head in her hands. "I…I don't feel so good." 

Estel moved closer, and put an arm around her. Needless to say, this did not help her nausea and speeding heartbeat. 

"What ails you?"

"Owwww…" she moaned. "I…my stomach hurts. I think it must have been…something I ate…"

Estel gasped. "Nay, that is impossible. Food from the kitchens of Rivendell makes no stranger ill!"

The credibility of this statement was somewhat diminshed when Thalia leaned over and began hurling on thebeautiful Elven…carpet…thing. It was some time before she expelled everything she had eaten in Rivendell's kitchen.


	6. Chapter Five: String Theory

Probability

By Thalia Weaver

A/N: *****counts reviews* Eeeexcellent…:) Now, in this chapter, your eternal question will be answered: how does Elrond react to diarrhea? (dun dun dun…)

Disclaimer: Oh, honestly, people, are you stupid? 'Snot mine. *giggles* Tee hee…snot….

Chapter Five: String Theory

Imagine an atom as a shell; cut it in half, and within, past the frantically orbiting electrons, and inside the inert protons and neutrons, you will find particles so small that there are millions within just one of your fingernails. Now imagine that within them, composing them, there are infitesimally tiny loops of subatomic 'string', whose oscillating loops form the cosmic harmony of the universe…

~.~.~

"Vende, a cuiva,"* said Lord Elrond, waking Thalia up. Her head immediately began pounding, and reflexively she sat forward before what little remained in her stomach came up.

Lord Elrond swiftly held out a wooden bucket, into which she hurled. Thalia sat back, clutching her stomach. 

"Never has the food of Rivendell caused such sickness in a stranger," he said, frowning. "What exactly _did _you eat?"

Thalia shrugged. "Nothing but what the cook gave me. Some bread, I think- there were really good cakes. And some ale."

He nodded, his face clearing. "And you have never before drunk ale?" 

She nodded.

"Ofttimes the ale of the elves may cause a sickness in strangers," he said. "There is naught I can do for it, I fear. Your bowels must clear themselves in whatver manner they can, and it will be some days before you recover."

Thalia's eyes widened, and she gasped. "LordElrondIhavetopoop!" She exclaimed, the words running together.

He frowned. "What?"

"Lord Elrond…I have to poop," she replied, blushing.

He nodded. "Can you wait a moment?"

Thalia groaned. "I'm not… sure."

He handed her a chamber pot, taking it from its storage place under the bed. 

"Use this," he said, and exited.

Thalia eyed it balefully, wishing for a flush toilet. Soon, howerver, her roiling bowels overcame any such squeamishness.

Lord Elrond re-entered the room a few minutes later. Thalia, spent, was sleeping peacefully against the pillows, snoring occasionally. 

He eyed the chamber pot, wrinkling his nose slightly at the smell, then picked it up.

The elf-lord winced at the brown liquidy mass within the pot.

"Diarrhea. I might have known."

***

"Never have I seen a case so grave of the ale sickness," Elladan said later, as Thalia stirred in her sleep and moaned a little.

Elrond shrugged. "Perhaps it is by virtue of the land she hails from," he replied.

Elladan turned to his father. "Where does she hail from? You did not tell me."

Elrond sighed. "She…comes from another world, my son."

"What?" Elladan asked, puzzled.

His father shrugged. "Long have I guessed that something exists beyond Arda- even Ea," he replied. "There are…feelings, sometimes… but I do not doubt her word. My _fëa _tells me that it is truth."

Elladan nodded, his brow furrowed. "But how did she come to be here?" 

Elrond shrugged again. "I do not think she knows, herself…but I have not yet had time to question her. She was too weary and hungry to be coherent when first we spoke, and now the Valar know she is too ill."

Elladan searched the sleeping girl's face for some hint, some sign of the distance she had travelled from her home, but saw nothing.

"Mortals are like children while they sleep," Elrond said, echoing his son's thoughts.

Elladan nodded. "It is as though all their worries and troubles disappear. I wonder if their death is like an endless sleep?" He sighed. "To rest such for eternity- there would be comfort in oblivion."

His father touched his hand, and their eyes met. "That is not the fate of the Eldar, my son. I have wondered on it also." An ancient pain lit his eyes. "After your mother left…"

Thalia, asleep, issued a momentuous explosion, completely shattering the moment. Elladan winced.

"Such odor from one so small!"

Elrond turned to leave, being experienced in such matters. "There will be more from whence it came."

They left too late to escape a barrage of flatulence. Thalia stirred in her sleep, a ghost of a smile seeming to flit over her unconscious features.

A/N II: *is evil* Muhahahah. Much apologies to Elrond and Elladan for having their mushy scene interrupted.

* Maiden, awaken!


	7. Chapter Six: Relativistic Quantum Theory

Chapter Six: Relativistic Quantum Theory

A/N: Really speedin' up the chapters, aren't I? *sweet smile* You love me! You really love me! ;)

Disclaimer: Nothing is mine/ nothing I own/ nothing but myself/ and myself alone. Look, it rhymes!

__

Imagine that empty space is not, in fact, empty…when looked at with an incredibly powerful microscope, it is a landing field for a violent quantum flurry. Matter flicks in and out of existence, disappearing and re-forming in less than an eye-blink. Imagine that energy and mass are one and the same…

~.~.~

Three days had passed, and Thalia had recovered from her brush with Elven ale. She was now strictly forbidden to drink anything but water and milk, a mandate that suited her fine. Of course, recovered health had its downside; Lord Elrond had commanded her to be in the library at eight o' clock the next morning.

"Thalia. Please sit," he said, motioning to the chair opposite him. 

"Your library is awe-inspiring, Lord Elrond," Thalia said after she was seated, eyeballing the huge shelves full of leather-bound books.

"Thank you," Elrond replied courteously. He leaned forward, fixing Thalia with a stare that made her feel like a beetle on a card. "Do you remember how you came to be outside of Imladris?"

She shook her head. "I fell asleep in my own bed, in-" her face fell, and the next words were almost whispered. "In Stratford, New Jersey." A lump formed in her throat.

__

I didn't even think about home, she thought. _Didn't even think about Mum and Da, back home…they must be missing me._

"Thalia?" The elf's voice was almost gentle; he had tended to enough humans to know that she was close to tears.

"I am sorry, Lord Elrond," she said thickly, a few tears coursing down her face. "I-" She closed her eyes, trying to hold in the hysterical sobbing, screaming fit that threatened to burst from her. A few more tears escaped her tightly shut lids.

"Perhaps we had best postpone this to another day," Elrond said regretfully. 

Thalia nodded perfunctorily, leapt up from her chair and ran blindly out of the library. She rushed down a few staircases like a whirlwind, ran through a few beautiful passageways, and finally flung herself down behind a random beautifully worked pillar. 

She drew her knees up to her chest and sobbed, rocking back and forth.

"Oh, god…home, home, home, home…" She whispered to herself, tears spilling into her mouth, falling down her chin and dropping onto her neck.

Some time later, she had cried herself out, and stood, sniffling. She wiped her streaming nose on her sleeve, and walked forward, trying to remember which way her room was.

"Thalia?" A voice came from behind her.

__

Oh, potato peels dipped in frying marmalade, if that's who I think it is… Thalia thought, stopping short. She turned around.

It was Estel, of course, looking adorable shy. And hot. And unsure of himself. And hot.

"I…heard you crying," he said, his grey eyes widening. "I just wanted to make sure that you were all right."

Thalia nodded, mentally blaspheming any and all applicable deities. "I'm fine." She took a deep breath. "Thank you."

"You are most welcome," he replied, with a shy smile.

__

Why's he smiling at me? My face must be about the size and color of the Macy's Day Parade Clifford balloon…

Nevertheless, she smiled back, barely managing not to melt at the expression in his eyes- genuine concern, and some pity. 

__

Damn that Arwen! Damn her! Damn her!

"Thalia…I-" He sighed. "I hope you are feeling better."

__

Ack. He's TAKEN.. Spell it with me: T-A-K-E-N. Willnotmesswithcanonwillnotmesswithcanon…

"Yes, I…I believe that I have quite recovered."

"Elenfathiel had to clean your room," Estel blurted. "He said he had never smelled anything so awful in his life, and he has lived three thousand years."

Thalia blushed scarlet. "I'm sorry! I didn't mean to smell up Rivendell." She sighed. "I seem to ruin things, wherever I go."

"No, it's- you didn't. Ruin anything." There was a pregnant pause. 

"Estel? Estel, you promised you would-" The owner of the voice, a random elf, entered the scene, his arms full of arrows. "-Help me fletch these arrows. Unless, of course, you are busy."

Estel's face was somewhere between the color of a tomato and a fire engine. "Nay, Poldon, I will come." 

Thalia's face had somehow turned even redder. "I- thank you, Estel." 

__

Willnotmessswithcanon…DAMN ARWEN! …willnotmesswithcanon…ACK, I DON'T NEED THESE MORAL DILEMMAS!… willnotmesswithcanon…


	8. Chapter Eight: Event Streams

Probability

By Thalia Weaver

A/N: Whee! Eighth chapter! I like this chapter J This story is FUN to write. And Aranel, if you're reading this: I have part of the ninth chapter of There And Back Again? written. I was wondering if you wanted to beta-read it?

Disclaimer: FAN FICTION IS FUNNER! I don't own anything original except some poems. Oh yeah, and these stories I wrote in the first grade that was called "Delia Meets the Dragon"…

Chapter Eight: Event Streams

__

Everything that happens in the universe, and in other universes, starts a chain of events that echoes through thick space. Each of these changes has a beginning…and an end…

~.~.~

Thalia dipped her feet in the cool stream that ran through one of Rivendell's groves, missing her home. She had run out of tears; now all that remained was a fiercely aching loneliness. Several elves had looked at her quizzically as they passed; but she was oblivious, staring out into the distance.

* * *

Estel gazed outwards from his balcony, chin in hand, his eyes far away. In his mind, he ran over and over his conversation with Thalia, unable to get it out of his head. Distractedly, he ran a hand through his hair, then decided that his thoughts were getting him nowhere. He moved to walk into his room. It nearly frightened him out of his skin when he ran straight into his foster brother.

"Elrohir! I…you startled me." 

The elf smiled. "Never have I seen you so distracted, my brother. I have been standing behind you for nigh on a quarter of an hour."

Estel sighed again. "I have been much disturbed of late."

Elrohir hid a grin. "It is the girl, is it not?"

Estel looked up, startled. "Is it so plain?"

"Only to those who know you well."

"I…" The boy shook his head wonderingly. "She makes me feel foolish, as though my head were muddled. I hardly even know her."

Now Elrohir's grin could not be contained. "I have heard that it is often such with mortals."

"She is not fair, like an elf-woman," Estel continued, ignoring Elrohir. "Indeed, she is hardly beautiful at all, nor is she elegant, or riveting, or graceful… but there is something nevertheless. I fear it is but foolishness."

Elrohir, with mighty effort, managed to suppress an un-elven-prince-like snort at Estel's description of Thalia. "Estel…perhaps you should speak to her, and get to know her better?"

Estel nodded, looking fiercely thoughtful. "I will indeed, my brother."

* * *

Thalia followed the gentle stream deeper into the forest, until it flowed into a secluded clearing and formed a deep-looking pond. The day was hot, and the water looked cool

__

I wish I had a bathing suit, she thought. _Eh…what the hell…this clearing is pretty out of the way,_ _anyway._

Soon, a loud yell of "Bonzaiii!" echoed through the clearing, followed by a splash. Thalia's elven dress lay sprawled in a crumpled heap on the ground.

* * *

"Where is she? Where is Thalia?" Estel asked his foster father, panting slightly. He had run through much of the Last Homely House, yelling 'Thalia! Thaliaaaaaaaaaa!' at the top of his lungs.

Lord Elrond, somewhat startled by his foster son's whirlwind entrance into his private library (although, of course, he quickly recovered his poise), answered, "Beruthien told me that she was sitting in the woods by the north stream…"

"Thank you, my lord," Estel said hurriedly, turned, and ran out.

* * *

Thalia surfaced, sputtering a little. _Pool's deeper than I thought it would be, _she thought, and dove under again.

* * * 

Estel followed Thalia's tracks along the stream until he reached the clearing in which the pool lay. The tracks suddenly stopped, and he looked up, seeing Thalia's dress lying on the ground. _What? _He thought. _Why would she…? Is she all right? _He picked up the dress as though to search it for clues as to the location of its wearer.

* * *

Thalia surfaced again. _Okay, that was _fun, she thought, swimming to the bank. She got out of the water, pushing her dripping hair out of her eyes. _Where's my dre-_

She looked up. There stood Estel, staring at her like a man who had found the promised land, her dress in his hands.

Face glowing like a sunrise, Thalia turned and ran into the water again, diving in. 

OhshitohshitohshitohSHIT… 

"Thalia!" Estel cried, blushing furiously. "I am sorry!"

The few that bubbles popped up and broke on the surface of the water were his only reply. 

__

Wonderful, Estel thought, grimacing. He placed Thalia's dress carefully on the ground by the river and walked dejectedly away.


	9. Chapter Nine: The Double Slit Experiment

Probablility 

By Thalia Weaver

A/N: I'm not too sure about this chapter. It may stink. Tell me if it does, okay?

Chapter Nine: The Double Slit Experiment

__

When an electron travels between two points, according to Feynman's theory it travels every possible path at once...because when you view the world at a quantum scale, it stops making sense and becomes a frantic, undulating world full of a host of bizarre, vacillating particles...

~.~

Thalia was officially in a state of bliss so profound it illuminated her whole being: she had found Rivendell's library. It had all begun rather innocently; she had been wandering around late at night, being the victim of both a latent insomnia that periodically manifested itself and a slight case of post-traumatic stress from the events of the day. She had wandered into the library and immediately whacked her shin on a bookshelf. After some fumbling, a few bruises and many a muttered curse, she found the cache of candles and matches that had been left lying on a convenient table. Once she had enough light to see by, she nearly fell over backwards.

"Well, call me a Kilted Yaksman," the stunned girl whispered, shocked. She lifted the candle higher. Before her, like solidified epiphanies, stood bookshelf upon bookshelf stocked with musty tomes. Thalia nearly salivated. 

__

So many books, so little time, she thought, grinning. _Where to begin?_

**

Morning found her with her face stuck firmly to the pages of "An Account of the History of Doriath". She awoke with a start to find the sun shining brightly through a large window and her head aching with fatigue. 

"Gnuuuuurh," she moaned drowsily at nothing in particular, stretching and yawning. She rubbed her eyes, sighing, and got to her feet- just as one of the precariously balanced piles of books she had placed on the table, hardly the epitome of steadiness, fell over. Thalia, in a misguided attempt to rescue the precious volumes, made a dive for them- using a patented move that had made her famous during the volleyball tournaments in gym. Unfortunately, one of the books fell directly on her head. 

Shaking her bruised head dazedly, Thalia got to her knees and attempted to stand, despite the massive wave of pain in her skull.

"Are you all right?" a voice from somewhere above her asked. Due to the Narrative Laws of Comedy, it was, of course, Estel. Needless to say, Thalia was not at her most attractive- sporting bed hair, a few nasty bruises and the general effects of severe lack of sleep. 

"I'm fine," she answered unconvincingly, and tried to stand again. This time she managed to get to her feet, swaying a little. 

"Are you sure?" Estel asked, concerned. Thalia, in reply, swayed, shut her eyes and fainted.

** 

"She has a concussion," came the voice of Lord Elrond from somewhere above her. Thalia blinked experimentally. 

"Thalia? She's awake!" Estel. 

"I can see that. Thalia?" Elrond's voice was gentle, soft and placating. She attempted to focus on him. 

"Lord Elrond?" Thalia asked, dazedly.

"Yes?"

"Why are there two of you?"

~.~

A/N Pt II: Thalia's really accident-prone, isn't she? ^^ Much like me in that respect. I know piling diarrhea, ale sickness, flatulence, embarrassment AND a concussion on one little...er...me... may seem a bit much, but...well...I mean this story as something of an Anti-Sue, so it's intentionally over the top....and don't worry! The concussion actually serves a purpose. Now, if I can only figure out what it is... -Thalia


	10. Chapter Ten: Planar Universes

Probability, Chapter Ten: Planar Universes  
  
The universes exist on separate planes, parallel but forever separate. But sometimes- if the probability chains intersect just right- the fabric of space-time may bend...and bring them together...  
  
Thalia blinked. The room wavered back and forth, dizzily.  
  
That's funny, she thought, Lord Elrond is spinning...  
  
There was a pause.  
  
Moments later, a snore that would have put the Texas Chainsaw Massacre to shame filled the room.  
  
~*~  
  
"Is she all right?" Estel asked, looking worriedly at his foster father.  
  
Elrond frowned. "I am unsure. She still suffers from the blow to her head..."  
  
"Has she awakened yet?"  
  
The elf-lord shrugged. "I gave her a draught that should speed the recovery, but I do not know how well she will take it...she is like none of the Children of Men I have tended to- weaker, somehow..."  
  
Estel nodded, his brow still knit. "Will she die?" he asked, his troubled face still full of the innocence of youth.  
  
"I do not think so, my son."  
  
~*~  
  
Just dream...  
  
Dream, and see-  
  
a sunny day, blue skies...a house...the leaves turn to autumn, and- a girl...  
  
small, dark-skinned...she laughs- smiles-  
  
what happens? something-  
  
something- stars appear-  
  
they seem to bend...  
  
the girl-  
  
gone-  
  
"Rrrrgh..." Thalia muttered. She felt as though a crowd of cleat-wearing soccer players had mistaken her head for the field. "Ow."  
  
"You're awake," Estel said.  
  
"Oh-" she sat up, quickly- much too quickly. "Ow..."  
  
"Are you all right?" he asked, concerned.  
  
"Muhhhh," Thalia groaned, clutching her aching head. "Who are you?"  
  
~*~  
  
"Estel claims that she has no memory at all," Elladan told his father, sounding concerned. He had grown rather fond of the strange girl in the weeks she had inhabited Rivendell. Admittedly, she had spent much of the time unconscious and emitting various noises and toxins, but she seemed sweet enough.  
  
Lord Elrond frowned. "I have heard of this before...I fear she may never regain it."  
  
Elladan gasped. "Never? But-"  
  
"Oh, I have seen it happen that their memories return after a few months," his father reassured him. "Still, there are some who never do..."  
  
~*~  
  
"Thalia," Thalia repeated. "So that's my name?"  
  
Estel nodded.  
  
"I can't remember..." she put a hand to her head distractedly. "Anything."  
  
"Nothing?"  
  
"Nothing past an hour ago, at any rate. I...woke up, and you were there. You- Estel," she said, looking at him for confirmation of this. He nodded encouragingly, attempting a smile. "Then...you left, and- now you're back."  
  
His face fell. "That's it?"  
  
"Well, other than this goddamn headache, yeah, that's it."  
  
Everything else was completely, terrifyingly blank.  
  
"Estel," came a voice from the door. Lord Elrond, looking tired, was standing in the doorway. "You had best come with me, and leave Thalia to her rest. If I'm not mistaken, she has a terrible headache."  
  
Estel nodded, and, casting a last worried glance at Thalia, went to join his foster father.  
  
Lord Elrond nodded courteously to her; she looked uncomprehendingly at him, obviously having no idea who he was. With a swirl of robes, he left, shutting the door behind him.  
  
"You'll come back, right?" Thalia called, after a pause. "Right?"  
  
She sighed, slumping back on the pillows. A dagger of pain stabbed through her head. "Whoever you are..."  
  
^_^ What'd you think? 


End file.
